5 Roles Friends Have Taken On in Support of My Dreams

Whenever I am developing characters for my book, I always look to my myriad of friends. They are a constant source of inspiration. Doing so brings me face to face to the specific positions my friends hold in my life.
I love my tribe. They are as varied as they are loving. Our complicated histories intertwine in all the best ways and surely without them I would be less of the woman I am today. To be clear, most of them hold more than one role in my life. Even here they take on more than one trait, but for the purposes of this blog I’ll assign them only one.

This post is an homage to the grace they’ve brought to my life. It is by no means an exhaustive accounting of the roles they have played, just he roles they’ve played most often. In some ways, all of these roles overlap. They’ve all been different things to me at different points in my life. It is only now, as I sit with thoughts of growth and continuous change that I dwell on those who remained steadfast and present in my life. The twisting turns of my path have always brought me back to them and their unending love. I honor that today.

Here are the five roles and the friends who most often hold them in my life. Here is how they’ve made me great.

 

The Motivator, Latasha Weatherspoon

All great dreams need some action to make them real. Since I’m prone to introspection and often succumb to the spiraling of negative thoughts, Latasha has been an intricate part in encouraging me to pull myself out. Despite being almost complete opposites we’ve shared similar backgrounds. Our lives have  paralleled in curious ways during our fourteen year friendship.

She is a source of inspiration, and often sends me Youtube clips, scriptures, and other insightful works to help keep me motivated. No matter the time of day, I know she’s available to talk me through my funk and get me back on course toward my vision. She is truly a person living her purpose. Having founded The Lifted Lifestyle, an empowerment movement, Latasha continues to expand her own visions. She pushes any who comes to her events, workshops to look past their perceived shortcomings and instead focus on their goals.

Every Dream builder needs someone in their circle like Latasha. The path of entrepreneurship is long and sometimes arduous. Having someone close whom you trust and who believes in your vision for your life is critical.  Be selective in assembling your tribe, and keep a motivator around.

The Fellow Dreamer, Stephanie Harper

Full of silliness, this one. If there is a joke to be told, a story needing dramatic affects, or an outrageous plan to be hatched Steph is there somewhere. Another lengthy friendship that has proven priceless to my life. We’ve grown  would be women to actual women together and one thing remains the same. We are the dreamers

Stephanie is another one of my friends who is constantly expanding the reaches of her ideal life. She is always available to throw ideas back and forward. Discussing the logistics of my plans with her has become one of the calling cards of our friendship. She is the voice that forces me to answer how I am going to execute my dreams. The fluff won’t do here. She wants my plans, and challenges me to be more than just optimistic. if I am not proactively pursuing those things I say I want, she calls me on it every time while still encouraging me to take time for myself when I need it.

The dreamer is the perfect compliment to the motivator as they are the ones who push encourage limitless creation. The greater the vision, the more difficult it can be to narrow down the tiny details that will make it work. A fellow dreamer knows that the bigger picture needs to be broken down into smaller pieces and built back up. All creators should surround themselves with others who create and are aware of the risks being taken to live out a dream.

The Critical Eye, Sondi Warner

My sister. We’ve been together all our lives. She is a writer herself and has carved out her place as an exceptional ghostwriter. Though she is my younger sister, her love affair with writing began well before mine. Her ability to weave a compelling story is awe inspiring. Because of this, I trust her implicitly with my work. She sees the holes I don’t see. Has a quick and driving writing style. I trust her voice. Often, I take my work to her for the feedback she gives.

I think what makes her presence so important to me (besides us being siblings) is because I admire her work. We share a love of writing and think critically about how  our work will be received. Her attention to detail, analysis of plot, and foresight for problematic areas in my work is something people pay thousands for. When I don’t go to her for an assessment, it shows in my work. Little details that she would have questioned me on glare back in the reviews of my work.

Whatever your dream, there should be someone you trust who’s critical eye can make your work stronger. This may be a sibling as in my case, but it almost doesn’t matter how they’ve come to your life. What matters is that they are invested in your dream because you are and when asked  they are willing to say the hard things to help you polish your work.

The Diversion, James Welch

Sculpter. Poet. Stencil Artist. James’ skills as an artist are only overshadowed by his open heart and the humble spirit. He is busy living his most authentic life and still makes time for me and my tomfoolery. His heart is pure and welcoming. He loves that I write, but he doesn’t always want to talk about my work. Perfect. Yes, please! I don’t always want to talk about my work.

We find common ground in knowing we are both making sacrifices to live out our dreams. We follow each others work, offer encouragement, and seek to see each other succeed. However, when we have the time to chat it up, work is only a side note in our lengthy conversations. I love him for being a normalizing spirit in my life. I love that he believes in my work and doesn’t feel the need to make me define it every time we speak. Instead, he wants to talk about my darlings, our lovers, and life in general.

On a day when everything has been hectic while trying to give bones to my vision, it feels great to have someone to decompress with. It is important. Having some separation from work is a form of self-care. James makes sure that I am doing just that. I know he supports me being writer, but mostly he supports me as his friend. Surround yourself with people who not only believe in the value of your dream, but also your value. They will be there whether things fly and/or fail.

The Silent Partner, Clifford B. Young

Eleven years and counting. We’ve seen the best and worst of each other. We’ve weathered false starts, failed attempts, and unforgiving consequences with each other. We’ve built a life with each other that in a lot of ways is not enviable. Yet, we thrive.

For those wo know eyes, silent hardly seems to fit  my husband. By nature, he is gregarious and a storyteller in his own right. He is full of wild tales, most true. When it comes to me and my work, he is the quiet reassurance that I have what I need to get it right.

There isn’t a person in this world who has more faith in me then him. I love him for that, and so many other reasons. My darling rarely ever gives me advice on my work. He’s the one who hears all of my crazy premises before they can become anything. He is the one who advocates for me, pushes my work, and stands back to give me room to blossom. He wants for me what I want for myself and does what he can to smooth the way for me.

His presence as someone who is committed to build my brand with me and still gives me room to pick the direction has proven time and again to be just what I needed. He trusts that I know what I want and walks with me through the processes of my development. I have a lifetime to thank him for all he does.

I am eternally grateful for the presence of these people in my life. All of them are creates, writers, and other mediums. They know me well, they love me hard, and I know they want what is best for me and my dreams. I don’t know that I would have accomplished as much as I have, or even dreamed as big as I have without them. I hope you’ve found these people in your life as well and I hope they make their way into your writing.

What are some of the roles friends have played in your dream building. Comment below.

Joy.

 

5 Hero Types I Fall For Everytime

My current book bae is Demitrius of Elisabeth Naughton ‘s Eternal Guardian Series. If you haven’t heard of the series you can get your copy here. Without any spoilers, I’ll tell you that Demitrious is tormented, smolderingly sexy, and completely impossible. Not my real life type ( except for the smolderingly sexy part. 😉 ), but definitely book bae material.

After repeatedly swooning of the striking Argonaut, it got me thinking about popular hero tropes. With hero’s (and heroines too for that matter) coming in so many forms,  would I ever have a true favorite? The answer is no. After trying to nail one down I decided I didn’t have to choose. I could love them all in their intricate forms. However, I did narrow down my favorite hero types. These boys/ men have never failed to get my heart thumping mad in my chest, and my cheeks in a heated blush. I’m sharing my favorite types here.

1. The Unforgettable Ex :

You know the type. He was pulled from our heroine’s life by some tragic event or menial fight and suddenly resurfaces. The moment he does, our heroine is stumbling over herself to determine if they should attempt Happily Ever After again. Bless.  He is always determined to prove they should be together. He’s had time to consider life without our heroine and found  no one else whets his palate quite like her. The satisfaction of watching them work through their issues and find a steady rhythm into love is swoon worthy romance. If only they could all end that way.

2. The Protector:

He’s the one called in when no one else can do the job. It starts off completely professional, then turns lust filled and finally he’s head over heels for the very woman he’s supposed to  protect. He is all business, but she melts his heart with her vulnerability and even when she would rather not, her need for him. The moment she decides she trusts him with her  life is his shinning moment. It is so damsel in distress, but when done well it empowers them both. He does his job, and our heroine realizes that her vulnerability is not the same as being weak. they live happily ever after.  His strength, strengthens our heroine. She is even more of her self because he refuses to let anything hurt her. It is a beautiful  thing to have someone who take the blows for you. I love him.

3. The “Mistake”:

They were never supposed to be anything, but there was something about this one night stand, passing fling or whatever he was that turns everything on its head.  Suddenly, the bad boy she never should have been with is all our heroine can think of. When she finally allows herself to see him as potentially more, their lives open up. His resistance to the idea is the first to openly crumble. She’s unforgettable in the best ways and he doesn’t want to walk away. Maybe it isn’t forever (except it always is), but he doesn’t want things to end like they are.  I love how he walks the line and plays his roles until our heroine is ready for him to be more. Then, it is full steam ahead as he pursues her. She just can’t resist.

4. The Tormented Redeemer:

He has a torrid past and he doesn’t want to talk about it. Women are a nuisance for him as  he resets his life. He doesn’t want to fall in love, let alone fall in love with her. But, he does. At which time he does everything he can to turn his back on what he knows is growing in him . He is protecting her from himself, but she doesn’t want to be protected from him. She wants his good, bad, and his ugly. He can’t fathom that she will actually be able to handle all that he is. Suddenly, there is nothing to hold back. She knows the truth. He is shocked by our heroines ability to stomach what he has hated most about himself. Now, he wants nothing more than to keep her close and he will do whatever she needs to prove it.  I like a flawed character who learns to forgive themselves for the sake of love, and the tormented redeemer is definitely that.

5. The Consummate Bachelor:

He is a professional. Loves his comfortable life and has his pick of women when he wants someone to bed. He isn’t looking for love. He isn’t interested in long-term. It is casual and sexy relationships or none at all. Until her. First, she is someone to be conquered. He wants to prove to himself that he can have her like all the others, but she has heard about him. Our heroine refuses to be another notch in his belt even if he does occupy all of her thoughts. The longer it takes to gain her attention, and trust, the more hopelessly in love he falls. She isn’t like the others, and her differentness is everything he needs. His instincts say resist. Get in and get out, but he can’t. After their first night together, his mind is blown and no one else would do.

Then, the life he’s enjoyed is lackluster. His taste has changed and only she can supply what he needs. In order for her to take him seriously, he has to change his bachelor ways and there is no better reason than her eternal love.

Swoon. I love them. I love them all. It watching them transform into the men their lovers need is so heavenly. Maybe it is the power of love and how it reveals us to ourselves. Whatever it is, these five hero types always get me going. Their transformations serve as proof that everyone can become their best selves with the right motivations.

Maybe it’s just the hopeless romantic in me that wants this to be true. I wouldn’t know, I’ve been married to my forever bae for nearly eleven years now. But I have hope for you beauties out there still looking. What’s your favorite hero type? Have you met him yet? Let me know in the comments.

Joy.

#HeroineInterviews

E: Sorry I’m late. I lost track of time.

(Euphoria Atkins enters the restaurant wearing a pretty black silk blouse and  pencil skirt that hugs her ample hips. She smiles easily and takes a seat directly across from me.)

E: I had a meeting that ran long. I hope I didn’t keep you waiting too long.

You’re absolutely fine. Should we order or dive right in?”

E:Oh you haven’t ordered. Oh God. please get some food. I called in my order because I thought you would have by now. In the meantime, fire away.

Firing now. So tell me about your friendship with charlotte Jackson. How did that began?
It began in college. Charlotte is a take charge kind of woman and substantially more extroverted than I am. So it took some pushing and pulling, but we’re really close.

Because you are opposites?

E:Absolutely.  We see the world from different places, and so we compliment each other. She’s the sister I never had, and I’m very grateful.

What did she say about your relationship with Nathaniel Blanchard? did she try to discourage you from being with a werewolf?

E: I won’t be commenting on Nathaniel.

(Her smile has grown exponentially. As the waiter places her food down in front of her and takes my order. I notice a moment of quiet joy sweeping over her smooth brown cheeks.)

Why not? He refused to talk to us about you too. Is there something the two of you are hiding. Maybe wedding bells or something along those lines.

E: Nathaniel and I agreed that we wouldn’t disclose details about our relationship until after the book was released. Even then, we don’t plan to share everything.

So what can you share with our readers about yours and Nathaniel’s story? Anything.

E: I can share that it is worth the discovery. I think your readers will enjoy watching  our story unfold, and gain a lot from it.

Okay, so you’re not going to tell us anything.

E: No. (She says with a throaty laugh.)

Well, I guess we will have to wait until April 23rd for the official release.

E: You won’t be disappointed. I promise.

We’ll take your word for it. So on to other subjects. It is rumored that you left a high paying Graphic Design job to start your business Euphoric Designs. What was the catalyst for your venturing out on your own?

(Euphoria holds her fork balanced on mid-way between her plate and her mouth. She’s thinking. Her brows are smooth, but her eyes are deep with concentration.

E: A number of things drove that decision. Ultimately, I believe I just wanted to own  more of my time and my creations. I was exhausted from working long hours on projects that didn’t matter to me or didn’t make me grow. I wasn’t motivated to do that for the rest of my life. So, I decided that if I were going to  work my life away I would do it for myself.

Dreams seem to play a big part in yours and Nathaniel’s story. What advice would you give other women who have a dream that they can’t get out of their heads?

E: I would tell them to stop trying to forget it. If it wasn’t part of my purpose to be a Graphic Designer and someday own my company, then it would have been an easy thought to dismiss. Since it wasn’t, I knew I had to pay attention to this. I had to  attempt to build it or it would eat me alive.

Eat you alive. That is a powerful choice of words.

E:It’s an honest choice of words. I love what I do. I was suffocating doing it for someone else. I realize it isn’t that way for everyone, but it was that way for me. I had to do something about it. I had to make a change.

How does building your company factor into your romantic life?

(Euphoria exhales as if I’ve just knocked the wind from her lungs, but her eyes glitter with amusement.)

E. It is challenging because entrepreneurship requires such long hours sometimes, but when you have the right partner your dream becomes important to them too. They understand, and you make the time whenever possible to ensure the relationship survives.

Is Nathaniel Blanchard the right partner?

E: No comment.

Darn. I thought I would get you with that.

E: Yeah, I saw what you did there. ( Euphoira wags her finger and smiles gleefully at me. I smile back amused that she’s caught me in my own trap.)

Since obviously you aren’t going to spill the beans for us, I’m going to ask you one final question on the record. Maybe when we’re off the record you will let me in on some of you and Nathaniel’s closely guarded secrets.

(Euphoria’s laughter is a wind chime of happiness.)

E: Off the record, maybe.

Give me three words to describe The Alpha’s Dream to our audience.

E: Hmm. Wow. Okay. You know the story has so many layers to it that I’m not sure where to begin. I think I would have to go with authentic, transformative, for us at least, and sexy. We  spin a pretty sexy story.

It’s funny  you should say that. Sexy and layered were two words Nathaniel used to describe The Alpha’s Dream too. I guess great minds really do think alike.

E:Yes, they do.

Thank you for you joining us Euphoria.

E. Thank you for having me.

Joy.

 

 

 

 

#HeroInterviews

(When at Authors& Characters Magazine arrive for our dinner conversation/interview Nathaniel is already there. He’s wearing a pair of denim jeans, a tee shirt from the team he played for, and tennis shoes. His muscles quietly carve out their place beneath his shirt and he smells like an expensive cologne that I can’t name. For a man worth millions, he looks very comfortable in jeans and a shirt. He stands as I take my seat, and only sits again after I do. True gentlemen. I’m already impressed.)

Today, we have a special treat. We’re going to be interviewing Nathaniel Blanchard of The Alpha’s Dream.  How are you Nathaniel?

N: I’m doing well. How are you?

Doing great. I’m excited about being with you here today. Your debut to the world is a little over a month away and there is a lot we want to know about you.

(Nathaniel laughs. It is a deep burst of sunlight and the smile that follows stretches his face into rows of gleaming white teeth. for a moment, I am quiet in all his black man joy.)

N: .I will answer anything you ask. Just fire away.

Great. We’ll try not to be too intrusive. So let’s begin with something easy. When did you realize that football would change your life.

N: I was in Junior high school before I picked up a football for the first time. I was bigger than all of my peers and faster and stronger. Pretty soon, I was getting attention from local high schools, then high school, and later college. It wasn’t until college that football started to feel like a possible career. I knew if I worked hard, I would be the same on a professional field as I was on that junior high field. So I kept pushing until the my stats proved it.

Wow. So It wasn’t a life dream, but an opportunity.

N: Yes, and opportunity. I knew that with playing football came a lot of other opportunities. I was financial stability, butt it was also a whole network of people who lived lives I’d only dreamed of.

Was it everything you thought it would be? You were on the highest platform and in front of millions. That had to be thrilling.

N: I was, but I wasn’t the whole picture. For every successful player I saw, I saw another who was throwing away his millions or just didn’t know what to do with their lives after playing ball.

Is that what inspired Alpha Athletics’?

N: absolutely. I saw a need among my peers for direction. We were the upper echelon with the best money managers, and agents the world had ever seen. Yet, I’m the only one of my retiring class who can still afford my lifestyle. I knew that other upcoming players would need more than just access to the best they could afford. They would need people who would tell them the hard truth. So, we have great agents, but really we look at each player individually and help them build their team with their future in mind.

Wow. That’s  a big undertaking.

N: Yes, it is. I’m okay with that. I’m okay with doing something extraordinary because of the effects it will have on the community at large.

How would you say your wolf heritage contributes to your need to build community?

N:That something I’m still working out. I have a complex relationship with my wolf heritage, and I want to explore its relationship to my life as is. I just haven’t don’t much of that yet.

Fair enough. I get the impression that saving the world takes a lot of your time. So, how does that translate for your love life?

(he laughs again. This time, he brings his hand to his mouth and rocks back in his seat. He’s staring at me with a lopsided grin as he begins again.)

N:It means I have very little time for things that aren’t … fruitful.

Is Euphoria Atkins fruitful?

N: No comment.

Aww Come on, I thought we were getting close here. She obviously has some influence, because your face lit up when I mentioned her name.

N: “She does have influence, but you’ll have to read the book to know to what extent.

You’re really protective of her. Care to delve into why?

N: Some things are worthy of protecting.

(Nathaniel straightens his long legs in front of him. The smile on his face is gentler now, and I can tell he is lost in his thoughts. Despite his refusal to elaborate on his relationship with Euphoria Atkins, I  know she has a special place in his head. It is written all over his face.)

Well, I’ve held you long enough. before we go, I have on more thing to ask. Give me three words that describe your story for our readers.

N: That’s a tough one. There are so many things I think the readers could take away from this book. I guess having to narrow it down now I would say… haunting, layered and sexy.

Haunting, layered, and sexy. Those are some strong words to live up too.

N: Believe me, The Alpha’s Dream lives up to that and more.

You’re not just saying that because you are in it?

N:I guess you will have to read it to find out.

I guess we will.

Joy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

#HeroineIntroductions

Last week, I introduced our lovely hero Nathaniel Blanchard. The strong Alpha wolf is nothing without his loving mate. Today, meet the woman who makes him reconsider everything he ever believed about life long love – Euphoria “Euri” Atkins.

Euphoria Atkins, is a talented and curvy New Orleans transplant. After years in corporate America, she decided to venture out on her own and do the work she loves as a Graphic Designer. Business is slow, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t give every project her utmost attention.

She’s the type of woman who treats her friends like sisters and believes there are no coincidences. Smart, funny, and endearing Euphoria is authentic to a fault.  She doesn’t lie to herself, especially when it comes to matters of the heart.

Beneath a strong and confident exterior is a soft and sometimes fragile interior. Her realistic nature won’t let her believe anything too willing, unless it already supports her premise. She trusts her gut, and her best friends. She loves hard, and long. When the time comes to lay it all on the line she does so with reservations. NOthing tests her heart more than her hero Nathaniel Blanchard.

Euphoria’s journey is one that most women can relate to  in at least one phase of her life. She is stronger than she thinks she is, wiser than she gives herself credit, and determined to make the best of her life. Noone walks away from her unmoved.

As we travel the journey of Euphoria and Nathaniel’s relationship together, the question is never whether or not she loves him. However, she has to get out of her head and let her heart guide if their love is ever to last.

#HeroIntroductions

I love my characters and I want you to love them too. So here is the first of a series of introductions to my loves. Shifters lovers meet our hero Nathaniel.

Nathaniel Blanchard is a 27-year-old, chocolate-brown werewolf with savior intentions. He’s a former Pro-Football player and aspiring business owner. He’s made a good living for himself and now he is reaching back to help anyone who might need a little guidance. He’s plagued by feeling disconnected from his werewolf, so he compensates by being the best “man” he can. This of course often puts him at odds with his beast.

Anyone who is anyone knows that denial of self is the easiest way to lose sight of everything in your life. It will take his willingness to delve deeper into why he feels split into two before he can have all that he’s dreamed.

What I love about Nathaniel is the very thing that threatens to bring him down-his stubborn pride. Nathaniel is not a werewolf who would ever be easily convinced of anything. He is hell bent on thinking for himself and coming up with his own answers. The hard truth about only trusting his own voice is not having room for other visions. He doesn’t want to be proven wrong and he holds on to his “wrongness” as long as possible.

It will not be easy for him to get passed this major flaw in order to fall for Euphoria. She is busy battling her own flaws. It is a struggle from start to finish as they work through their private matters to find their way to each other.

It is a battle that Nathaniel never expected to fight. Though he never stays single long he doesn’t actually believe in finding true love. The idea that his wolf heritage would mean one day finding his life mate is an even further stretch for him. Throughout his life, there is only one woman he ever believed loved him completely. His mother. Yet, it is her secret that could be the key allowing him to unlock his carefully guarded heart.

You should know that Nathaniel is just as loyal as he is stubborn. He will always stand by those who are close to him. Once he is sure of his love for Euphoria, he will fall on his sword to let her know he’s serious. Then, he will make peace with all the things that have kept him from revealing himself to her.

Nathaniel’s story comes full circle, but not without some intense private scrutiny. There  is so much he has to learn, but men like him never give up. And the women they love need only have faith.

Sounds like someone you could fall in love with. Leave a comment and let me know.

Joy.